Improving Self Confidence and Self Talk
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Improving Self Confidence and Self Talk
By Margi Matters
Improving self confidence requires you to understand the phenomenal power of self talk. Your self talk is like a running commentary, constantly going on in the background and it will either undermine you and consequently undermine your confidence or it can be a powerful reinforcer for improving self confidence.
Changing your self talk is one of the easiest strategies for improving self confidence.
Imagine if you had someone sitting on your shoulder, constantly judging and criticising you, constantly putting you down, telling you how useless, stupid, worthless, dumb or inadequate you are. How would you feel? How might you feel after a few days of this? After a few years of this?!! Sounds crazy right? Yet this is what we are doing to ourselves when we have low self esteem.
The big question to ask yourself is why would you do this to yourself? Why choose to continue to do this to yourself when it is as simple as recognising this negative self talk and stopping it the moment you become aware of it. Keep doing this and eventually it will lessen. Be determined to stick to it!
Self talk can be sneaky! Many of us are not really aware of our self talk and can be quite shocked and surprised at what we hear once we really start to listen to ourselves!
Instead of running on automatic, learn to really listen and immediately change negative self talk to something more positive. For instance if you mess up, just acknowledge it without judging yourself. Encourage yourself that you can do differently next time now that you know what you have learned from messing up. Sometimes we have to see what does not work in order to get a better handle on what does work. It is all just learning. Mistakes can be seen as just what doesn’t work!
There is a direct connection between what you think and what you feel. Change your self talk and you can change how you feel. Improving self confidence is learning how to change how you think and feel about yourself.
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